Of turning 30 and finding balance within

by Wanjiku Wanderi - Jorgensen May 22, 2012 7 comments

Still waters run deep, so do those who reside in silence.

Zen masters say that ‘you cannot see your reflection in running water, only in still water’. Learning to live in detached stillness, so as to allow myself to listen to the voice of God has been something that I chose to do since I relocated back to my home country, Kenya.

Allowing the weary and wild emotions to lay still in the comfort of silence and solitude. Admittedly, this has not been easy especially for someone like me who constantly wages multiple battles within. I have been one to constantly brood over life’s petty details, but as I’ve grown older, and more so towards the 30’s milestone, I have learned to find balance from within. Finding that safe haven of peace and stillness in a reserve so hidden within my very being that it would take a might shake up for me to be rattled by the mundane details of life’s cares.

As Elizabeth Gilbert aptly points out in her book ‘Eat Pray Love’, ‘the search for God is a reversal of the normal mundane worldly order. In the search for God, you revert from what attracts you and swim towards that which is difficult’. This calls for one to abandon their security blankets and do a free fall of faith – with the hope that something greater will be offered to you than that which you have given up.

I often like to say that ‘I am taking a huge leap of faith’ whenever I am making a decision of which the outcome is crucial but unknown to me. Lately I begun to ponder on the true grit of this phrase. I found the most logical explanation in Gilbert’s book. She notes that the ‘huge leaps of faith’ are because the decision to consent to any notion of divinity is a mighty jump from the rational over to the unknown. Basically, faith is not rational. Faith as spoken about in the Bible is the absolute belief in the unseen, untouchable, or that which we cannot prove by physical presence.

If I truly knew all the answers to the questions that I ask regarding my future – career, love, family, health, wealth or even the destiny of my soul – then my belief would no longer be an act of faith – it would no longer be a ‘courageous act of humanity’.

Faith to me then becomes the most paramount element of my life – the driving force that keeps me going. Faith by itself means completely absorbing God into my own lifestream – knowing that Faith and actions are enough to carry me through life’s circumstances.

Casting oneself to God in Faith and desperation is all well and good, but the ultimate reward comes when this is matched by active participation from my end. Furthermore, Faith without actions is dead!

Faith is my mantel, my guide rode into the beautiful life of 30’s.

God bless you

 

 

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7 comments

Catherine Ndirangu May 23, 2012 at 5:57 am

Beautiful writing! good work girl!

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Catherine Ndirangu May 23, 2012 at 5:57 am

Beautiful writing girl, keep up!!

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Grace Diana May 23, 2012 at 6:10 pm

Well said…. well said

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Faustin Chongombe May 25, 2012 at 1:30 pm

Excellent! We should start writing books together soon. Dr Faustin,

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Anastacia Njoroge May 27, 2012 at 1:00 am

Lovely writing Juju, Keep the faith and God will lead you to even greater heights- from the bible all that were healed,raised from dead, etc Jesus would tell them that it is their faith that healed em, so way to go!!!!

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Carol N.Meja May 30, 2012 at 12:50 pm

thouroughly enjoyed reading ur blog…,there is beauty in the words as if ur telling the story verbally.

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ag September 20, 2012 at 6:33 am

Very profound! And very true, we cannot afford to indulge ourselves in trying to fix our future, but we can have faith that all is going to be OK.
Jesus while talking to a multitude one time asked why we are so worried about our tomorrow when the birds of the air go about freely knowing that the creator will provide. Aren’t we more valuable us who have taken after his own image to him? The best we can do is to lay all our cares at the feet of the Almighty. Faith can move mountain.
Our desire then as his children would be to seek for wisdom like Solomon did, Wisdom that will help us make better decisions today. For it is said we are a sum total of our today’s decision.
Keep on with the inspirational writing.

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